Only one week left here in Colorado. wow.
The YMCA is surrounded by mountains of all levels of majesty, and it's fun to stare the range around us and imagine a sudden transport to the summit... to look back at the spot you're standing from miles away. Longs peak is behind our dorm... the three peaks of CC&Y to the front.
The nearest rock pile that could possibly be labeled a mountain is "Eagle Cliff." A short walk from our dorm to the base, the cliff overlooks Moraine Park - the center of the National Park, as well as Estes Park, and the Y. Not that I knew this from experience - just pictures. Although many people make this their first hike, I decided here in my last week that I should probably try it out - maybe as my last hike. :)
Just me, my Camelbak, and God this morning as I set off on the trail - which immediately appears to go straight up the side of the mountain. It feels like that too - leg burn that requires short rests every 50 feet.
And I invited God into my thoughts.
Maybe the hiking-as-life metaphor is overdone, but it found me anyway. While hiking I lost the trail. I had to rest often. I few times I felt discouraged - my legs hurt, my lungs were uncomfortable, and it the goal of reaching the top became less important. "why would I need to continue?" I wondered. "I'm content with how far I've gone," something in my head stated. "stop. feel better," my knees said.
I told a group of people at dinner the other day that I'm not like Nick. He likes to summit mountains for the challenge. I said that I don't find that my motivation. Beauty is the reason I hike, but if it becomes unpleasant past a certain level -I don't see a reason to continue.
This is how I find myself living my spiritual life. Forward moving until it hurts - then, when it does (and it always does) - seeking immediate rest, pleasure, and escape. And more disconcerting: I don't know if I really have a strong desire to summit the mountain that God has me on. Survival, and nice interludes are enough to make me content. If the top hurts too much - if the weather is too inclement - I'm done.